As long as I can remember, the gathering place for my family, has always been in my parent's bedroom. That is where we watched the X-Files, for Family Home Evening, and that is where I introduced my future husband to my parents.
The best part of my trip to VA, was hanging out on my parents' bed, with my family. We watched the Olympics late into the night, eating chips and clam dip, drinking Diet Coke, and critiquing the Chinese gymnasts. My beautiful little sister, Hannah, trying to time her power belch to coincide with the swimmers' whistle.(She is available)
It was hard to leave, and I was dreading the travel parts, but Dawson and Emma slept both legs of the trip. Dawson kept everyone lined up to board the plane, entertained with his rendition of Low, by Flo Rida. He had his IPOD earphones in, and was dancing and singing out loud. He might be the next white rapper. He also told the flight attendent that she was "smokin' hot like his mom."
It was so good to see Dave! We all missed him so much, and I know he missed us. He brought presents to the airport. The boys' got their own tape measures, and hammers, to use on the new house, Emma got sunglasses, and I got a 44 oz. Diet Coke.
It was a great trip, but we are glad to be home.

We have been in Virginia now for a couple of days, and my boys would be perfectly happy to just move in with my parents. They love their Grandpa Ranny,and Nana.
Today we took the kids to the National Zoo. There is a specific purse shop that I like to frequent in the District, that we hit before the zoo. I was disappointed to find the original dude was nowhere to be found, and that the spot had been taken over by a hard-ass Asian lady, who did not haggle. I have never left that shop without 5 or 6 fake designer purses, but today, I left empty handed. Dave was glad to hear the news however, since I usually give the purses away, or sell them for 50 cents at our annual garage sale. I really enjoy the haggling.
The zoo today was so stinking hot and humid. Even the indoor exhibits were hot. The boys were total troopers for the first part of the day, but Emma was a pain. She is so damn independent right now, and it drives me crazy. She has to do everything herself. I got no sympathy from my Dad today, who just likened Emma, to a story about her mother taking the scalpel and having to cut her own umbilical cord. That's only amusing when I'm not sweating profusely, and having an argument over who gets to push the stroller, with an 18 month old.
I distracted Emma with an enormous carton of chilled sugar,and got the boys each one as well. At some point, someone in our party told Dylan to keep his iced sugar out of the sun or it would melt. As we were walking, he stopped short at the end of the shade and let out a blood curdling scream. I hurried back to him, thinking he must have had a limb ripped from his body, but it was just the thought of going into the sun with his treat. He kept screaming " but, I'm not supposed to go in the sun!!" It was mildly entertaining to watch him run from patch to patch of shade for the next 45 minutes with his treat.
Overall, we all had a great time, and I know we will sleep good tonight.

Karma

So here's the thing about me. Sometimes I am dramatic. Sometimes I cause a scene. At times of high stress, I tend to act out. The irony to that, however, is that my chosen career, is one of drama and high stress, which I handle fairly calmly.

Today I loaded up my three angelic cherubs, and my 19 year old sister,(think drama and high stress) and boarded a cross country flight to Virginia, for a 2 week visit with my family. Everything went fairly smooth, as we boarded the plane, and if the plane attendant heard me call him a douche bag, when he made us go to the back of the line, he didn't let on. Apparently families with young children don't board in the first 50 sections now.

When we finally settled into the very bowels of the plane, I already had my, "I seriously dare you to comment on my kids" look, down. I was glad to have Hannah around to help haul kids, but her seat belt must have been laced with "sleepy dust" since she was comatose before we left the ground. The boys' were very well behaved and excited to see Grandpa Randy. They made it 2 hours into the flight before they had to use the bathroom, and so with minimal displacement, we went to the tiny bathroom, did our business and were back in our seats lickety split. I had no sooner put their little earphones back on, when the crotchety older women ahead of us turned around, and this was our exchange:

Nasty Lady: "Tell your kid to stop kicking my seat."

Me: "We just came back from the bathroom, I assure you he wasn't doing it on purpose."

Nasty Lady " Well, your baby has been squawking the whole time."

Me: "Hand me your pillow, and I will smother her."

Nasty Lady: muttered something about inexperienced young mothers, something or other, blah, blah.

Me: "You know what lady, these aren't even my kids. My sister died in a car accident 3 weeks ago and now I am doing my best. So you will excuse me if I haven't mastered the art of mothering in 3 weeks."

My voice almost cracked at the end, because I was a little stressed out anyway. After the altercation, the man sitting behind me reached up through the seats and squeezed my arm. He said, "that's a good thing you're doing." When the plane landed, everyone around me was staring the lady down, and Hannah and I were cackling, like the couple of witches that we are.

I didn't handle the situation very well, and I definitely vow to work on my self-restraint, come New Years Day. We got off the plane and made it to our connecting flight with time to spare. We got the very first seats on the plane and I was feeling pretty good, until Dawson wanted to watch a movie, and I realized I had left the borrowed DVD player somewhere in the Chicago airport.

Karma.

La Goon

Dave and I surprised the boys with a trip to Lagoon today. Yesterday, I told them that we would be doing something special, and they were funny about guessing. "Is it better than going to Grandpa Randy's?" "Is it better than Chuck E. Cheese?" Seriously, Chuck E. Cheese. I hate that place.

Anyway, they were very excited when we pulled up to the park, and the delirium didn't wear off until they passed out cold about 10:00 tonight. Dylan is only 44 inches, and you have to be 46" for most of the rides, and I'll be damned, but those teenyboppers working the rides, only look spaced out and chromosome challenged. They kicked us out of line every time. Dyl, was alright about it though, he rode a few good rides and then hung out in Kiddieland. Dylan got a little nervous about the rides after the Pirate Ship gave him butterflies, so I had to encourage him all through the line for Puff the Dragon. I held him, and talked to him forever in that stupid line, and when we got to the first of the line I folded myself into the tiny seat and turned around to help Dylan get in, and he was nowhere. I finally spotted him in the front car with another little boy. He was waving, and yelled back to me, that he wanted the front seat. The little turd totally desereted me, and then I was stuck, by myself riding the kiddie coaster. The snot nosed kid that ran the ride, came up to me and smirked, "please buckle your seatbelt ma'm." Like I could get out of that damn thing, without a bucket of crisco and few magic tricks. The worst was when Dave came back with our friends, and there I was, smashed into the kid roller coaster all by myself.

Dawson made the height cut-off by an inch, and every ride he got of was "frickin' awesome," and he wanted to go again. We had to keep shepherding him down the rides, because he thought it couldn't get any better. When we made it to the adult rides, he was hell bent on riding every last roller coaster, except Colossus. He didn't want to go upside down, so I made a bet with him. We pinky promised that he could ride it one time, and if he hated it, I would give him $5, but if he like it, he had to give me a hug. He and Dave headed of for the roller coaster, and Dave said that after they came out of the loops, Dawson yelled over to him, "I'm pissed!" Dave asked why, and Dawson said, "Because now I have give mom a hug, Wha Hooooo!"

New Bikes !!

Finally the day has arrived, and the prophecy has been fulfilled. If you earn them, they will come..... So, about 6 months ago, I started talking to my Daveskins about getting the boys new bikes. They had both outgrown their little bikes, and they seemed dangerously rickety. My idea was to pack everyone up in the car and head out right then to buy new bikes. Dave, however, wanted to make them earn the bikes.(He is soooo responsible, total turn on.) Anyhow, we ended up making them a chore chart with about 80 boxes. and over the last several months they were able to fill them in. Dawson was especially diligent about doing his chores, and was very helpful. Dyl, is more like me in the chore department, and will go to great lengths to avoid helping, i.e dish belly ache, sudden vision loss, and that type of thing. The last part of their bike deal was that they had to sell their other bikes at our moving sale over the 4th. Dawson struck a hard bargain with one of the cousins, when he told him that he had to have 20 bucks. He was a little disappointed when he came over and I had already sold it for $5. Dylan rummaged through my bro-in-law's garage and found a truck and trailer that he wanted, and ended up trading his bike to Kent for the treasure. About 5 minutes later, he came back to Kent and wanted to trade back, since the trailer hitch had broken off the truck, but a deal is a deal.

Today we headed down to Toys R Us, and each boy carefully examined the bikes and their amenities. Everyone came home pleased with their purchase, and with themselves for earning it. Emma didn't do jack for the last six months, but we still bought her a bike. Her dad is going to be in big trouble when she really gets around to batting those eyelashes.

Fourth of July

Today was a fun day. The boys' rode on Dylan's preschool float, and I couldn't tell if Dylan had fun because he looked pretty somber the whole time. He said that he had a good time, but both boys were mad that they had not figured out that if you are on a float, you are not collecting candy. Fortunately, Emma collected plenty for all of them. Unfortunately, she took one bite out of every piece.

After the parade we went to a bbq at my bro-in-law's house, and the kids' played long and hard. Emma went around begging Mountain Dew from anyone that would give her some. She is a junk addict like Dylan, and her mother.

Tonight we went to the rodeo. I dread the rodeo every year, but my family likes it, so I endure to the end. This year it wasn't to bad. They didn't drag it out like they usually do, and the clown wasn't long winded. I did still sob like a baby when the rodeo princesses came in with the flag, and again at the barrel races. There is just something about horses running fast, that makes me cry. I thought the night was going to get really interesting when two Oakley Rodeo Queens made their way in front of us, dragging huge fur and leather purses that I can only assume were made out of their last horse, and sat down in the extra seats we had. With their fat hair and enormous cowboy hats, none of the kids could see. Deann, my sis-in-law, gave them the what for. The one queeny turned around and gave her a fake painted on smile, and said sorry in the most obnoxious titmouse voice. Now this is the kind of altercation I love. I was giving her another 30 seconds to move before the rhinestones went flying, but Deann held her ground and they moved. I was very proud of her. The fireworks were spectacular, and I am very grateful for my freedom.

Talk Dirty To Me

Tonight we went to the Poison concert. I trashed up my make-up, and picked at my black manicure in preparation, but I still looked like a phony groupie. I just haven't lived the hard life that gives most of the true groupies their authentic look. We went for Pho' before the concert, and were bummed out, when we pulled up to our favorite Viet place and it was closed for construction. We found some, clear out in West Valley that did the job though. When we got to the concert, Dokken was just finishing up. We had to climb over 4 enormous, drunk women who kept threatening to flash everyone, which was funny. The lead singer of Dokken, had a strategically placed fan that blew his hair back, straight out of the 80's videos, but the bassist had the perfectly tight permed, loonnggg, head banging hair, and it was beautiful. Several times we got mesmerized by the cascading perm. The music was good at the concert, but did not compare to the people watching. In between Dokken and Poison, they just played various hair rock, and their were these two guys with blow up guitars in one hand, and beers in the other. They were playing guitar and singing up and down the aisles. It was hilarious, especially when the smaller of the two guys decided to straddle the handrail in his leather pants and try to play his blow up guitar while sliding down the handrail. I guess the handrail was not as slick as he thought, as his junk got caught and he took an endo down the stairs. He came up smiling though, and kept right on strumming. We had a great time chanting "Highway to Hell" with everyone, and I would have to say, after Every Rose Has It's Thorn, (written for a stripper that broke Bret Michaels heart) my favorite song was Talk Dirty to Me.